5 years ago today, the husband and I made it official (yes we have two anniversaries, 14th September, our Islamic wedding when we made it legal and 24th August – the big wedding do).
These past years have indeed been quite of a rollercoaster ride, we had so many reasons to smile over but a lot of reasons to shed tears for.
Our relationship has been tested many times to the extent I admit, over the years, I have found myself wondering is it even worth it.
When our son passed away, our relationship took the turn for the worst. We were both grieving but in our own ways, he didn’t want to talk about it and just wanted to pretend like everything’s ok whereas I was and am the opposite, I prefer to talk about it, I wanted to talk about our son to everyone and expected that at least my husband would understand but at the time there was no response from him, I felt so alone.
He closed himself up to the extent he refused to have any keepsakes or photos of our precious little boy around the home, which broke my heart even more.
He was grieving, this was his way of grieving but I didn’t understand because all I ever wanted was acknowledgement that I was still a Mum but I didn’t get that.
We eventually got through this and he opened up one day and I realised that he was hurting too, of course he was, why wouldn’t he be? But I guess at the time we were both so vulnerable, we both just didn’t know how to react to each other that lead to us drifting apart rather than becoming even closer.
Throughout the years, I have found our relationship to be strange. One minute we can be the most loving couple the world has ever seen and the next we might be bickering with each other like two kids fighting over who drank the last of the chocolate milkshake in the fridge.
That being said, we’ve had so many moments, memories that we’ve created and cherished.
Whatever’s happened in the past few years doesn’t negate the fact that he is my rock, he helped me, he worked around the clock to make things work so I could stay at home with our daughter for the first year of her life and that’s only just a little snippet.
There’s been smiles, there’s been laughter, there’s been tears, there’s been heartbreak, but most importantly there’s been friendship.
I think that in every relationship, whether that’s with your spouse or someone else – friendship is the key because marriage is not a land of fairytales at all, it’s a journey with a lot of hurdles that you have to get through together, you’ve got to remember them vows, the promise to always take care of each other.
Yesterday may be have been cloudy and today rainy but tomorrow your rainbow may start to beam through.
These past 5 years have no doubt been adventurous but it perhaps has made us that a little bit stronger because phew I should receive some sort of a medal for sticking right? Just kidding, we’ll spare one for him too, on a serious note though we have already got a reward in the face of our beautiful rainbow daughter.
This is such a heartfelt and loving post. Relationships have ups and downs and its so nice that you two have worked together to overcome such things. Thank you for sharing.
Hannah | hannahslifediaries.com
Thanks Hannah. It’s been difficult but we’re still here standing so I guess that means something ❤️
What a beautifully honest post which I’m sure most couples can relate to ❤️ Thank you so much for sharing such a personal post with us all .Congratulations on 5 year’s of marriage and here’s to many more!
Melanie | http://www.frasersfunhouse.com
This is such a wonderful post Soffy. I definitely agree, relationships do have ups and downs but as long as there is friendship underneath it all that’s all that matters. Congratulations on five years and thank you for sharing your experiences. Wishing you many many more happy years together <3 xx
Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com